Skip to main content

The haunted valley #FiveSentenceFiction

The night of the full moon clad itself with a grey, smoky cover, throwing a muted and dispersed glow over the dark valley that was once inhabited by happy villagers until the fateful evening when a to-be-bride, jilted by her lover, jumped off the cliff to a violent death casting a permanent gloom over the village.

Ever since it was claimed that the girl, clad in her bridal outfit, disheveled hair left open and empty eyes, was seen standing at the edge of the same cliff on every full moon night, inhibiting travelers and natives alike from passing by the route, even as rumours of mysterious deaths in the valley gripped everyone with fear.

Not to be tied down by such superstitions, and with a lustful eye on the petite belle he could claim as his trophy, the village bully took up the bold challenge to drive down alone via the infamous route on a full-moon night at the behest of his inebriated ruffian cronies.

The stillness of the night, the accentuated sound of the steady roar of the two-wheeler, the swishing of the tree-branches as though in a hypnotic dance to an imaginary haunting tune, all added to the dark atmosphere and then all of a sudden there was a loud, screeching sound made by the abrupt halt of the rubber tires at the sight of a white apparition.

At this juncture, the recessed lights zoomed in gradually, and the 70 mm screen flashed the perfectly timed ‘intermission’, stirring the audience from the somber mood, yet keeping them guessing about the concluding part of the movie.

Lillie McFerrin Writes

Five sentence fiction written in response to the prompt: Darkness at LillieMcferrinWrites.

Lillie McFerrin Writes


  1. That was an end I wasn't expecting at all! :D

    You might want to look at the third sentence again "bully took the up the bold challenge" has an extra article.

    1. Thanks for pointing it out, somehow missed me! :-)

  2. Voila that was one surprising end :). Nicely done.

  3. That was chilling and I was waiting to see what would happen next and then you drop the bomb! Simply brilliant, Uma! :)

    1. Glad to see the trick worked, Aathira :-)

  4. So you decided to keep us guessing? So not fair!!!

    1. hehe..Keirthana, sometimes guessing is better than the actual one, no?

  5. Whoa that was spooky! Loved the twist in the end :)

    1. I'm glad you liked it, Vinodini :-)

  6. Wonderful twist there at the end! Nicely penned.


Post a Comment

Would love to hear from you :-)
Also, please click the subscribe by Email link below the comment form to get follow-up comments to your inbox..

Popular posts from this blog

Caffeinated attraction

Words jostled inside Anusha's head as she snaked her way between the tables to her favourite spot in the cozy cafe. She slid her laptop out, rested the bag beside her on the silver grey cushioned sofa and called for her favourite cappuccino. They made it just the way she preferred: the right amount of milk and coffee, the closest alternative to the filter kaapi her mom made.

Gazing out of the glass window, she sipped her beverage, letting the bitter-sweet taste linger, weighing her thoughts before her fingers could fly on the keyboard to give shape to them. The white fluffs of clouds against the clear blue skies floated gently with the summer breeze and they seemed, to the writer in her, like mischevious sheep that had strayed off the flock.

Oh, well, it's my mind that's straying now. Need to get my act right for my next submission. Anusha willed herself back to the present.

The cafe was Anusha's muse, the mecca she haunted during the weekends for the past three months…

The wedding

Holding hands under the inky blue bejeweled canopy, they swore allegiance to each other. Bedecked in a brown shimmery, the translucent veil flowing away from her coy face, she looked up nervously at him. He replied with an imperceptible nod that spoke volumes of quiet reassurance.

Family and friends had gathered for the ceremony that would bind the two lovers for life. The atmosphere was electrifying and the air abuzz with each of them signaling to the other in a frenzy of activity. A huddle in here, a huddle there, some grouping for a light tete-a-tete, some to discuss an important ritual.

The younger lot broke away from the crowd, not entirely connecting with the significance of the gathering, their individual frames dotting the arena like lost stars.

At the precise moment that would signify the sacred union, the chief called for everyone's unwavering attention. The scattered swarm, even the ones that had strayed, converged obediently towards the altar. Each member of the audie…

Rotting humanity

Doc, there's an emergency!

The breaking news flashes the brutal carnage. Images and voices float in my mind as I drive in manic speed to the hospital.

Of sirens blazing. Of toys and limbs lying scattered on a carpet of red and brown.

Oxygen! I scream. Pump, harder.

Doc, there's no pulse.

Shoulders slump.

I witness grief fuse into flames that rise up collectively at the mass funeral. The ashes fall lightly on me.

Will the stench of hate ever recede?

*** Written for a prompt at