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The Rival- A Five Sentence Fiction

Emma slammed the door behind her; her blood-shot eyes brimmed with fresh set of tears. Feelings of shock, disbelief, anger, self-pity and a quiet resolve melted into one another as quickly as milk into water even as the thought of her being replaced unceremoniously sunk in. Her love and trust had been shaken to witness the treachery and she vowed to fight back.

Back inside, the family had gathered to welcome and celebrate the arrival of the new member, fussing over her beauty and delicateness.

With her eyes tightly shut , Emma mouthed a silent prayer, “Dear God, please make mamma and papa take the baby back to the hospital. I didn't want a sister”, and threw a coin into the wishing well.

In response to the Five Sentence Fiction prompt: Wishes

Lillie McFerrin Writes


  1. Nice one Uma .. Quite a twist at the end :) I was expecting it to take another direction.

    1. thanks, Aarthy..I'm glad then it didn't take the expected turn :-)

  2. Hahaha!!.Such fears in the innocent child are real and can be removed with tact and extra love.Nicely written in a few sentences

    1. true, KP sir. It's always a delicate situation and needs careful handling.

  3. I remember a similar incident when a neighbour delivered her second child that first child had similar thoughts. But the mom deftly handled the situation putting an end to her first born's insecurity. Very well written story.

    1. Kudos to the mother who handled it well. It's a difficult situation for the parents to handle too. Thanks, Kalpana :-)

  4. Aww, how adorable! Sibling rivalry at its cutest :) Loved it, Uma :)

  5. Loved it! Such a realistic situation in many homes, Uma. Nicely handled.

  6. Both the posts are too good...truly a challenge given the criteria...:)

  7. Kids! How many of us would have done this? Reminded me of the tales that I heard from mom that my elder bro would pinch me when none is looking since he was feeling resentful from all the attention I was getting as a baby :)

    1. haha, yes, I've heard and been witnesses to such cute stories too..:-)

  8. ohhhhhhhh nooooooooo .. My mom tells me that was my wish when my sister arrived .. I wanted someone with whom i could go out and play cricket :)


    1. LOL, Bikram. I can imagine your plight! ;-)

  9. I wanted them to take my brother back too but now I love him to death! :D

    1. hahah, Red..brought back old memories, eh?


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