Do you have one in your life?

Google.com
After a long time, my friend A and I had a chance to have a (now rare) long afternoon cozy girl chat. As is the case with long cozy girl chats, we fleeted in and out of a hundred topics, laughing at silly jokes, empathising with each other, pulling each others' legs and generally reminiscing about the days/years gone by and how far we have come.

Having a BFF (best friend forever) means so much. It is so much easier to unburden yourself without the fear of being judged or misunderstood. The light-hearted gossip, the secrets shared, the out-pourings of a bruised heart, the silly banter is something one can enjoy only in the best friend's company. True, a husband can be a great friend too but sometimes only a girl can understand another :-) There is no better medicine than to talk your heart out to your BFF. Even if s/he does not really share your opinion, you wouldn't regret one bit in letting your soul bare. You'll be told exactly what you need to hear, also in the manner best suited to you. There are no instant solutions given at times, just an attentive ear for that's all you need then. There is an untold telepathy that senses what would be the right therapy. You can really be your dumb self and still not be laughed at. Your deepest/darkest secret is safe with her/him. When your hesitant, concerned confession like,"you know, I did this" is met by "thank God, you said this. You won't believe what I did!", you've met your soul-friend.

Now, this friend and I have known each other for about 18 years now. Phew! sounds like a lifetime, isn't it? And yes, which means we have pretty much been with each other through our best, worst and all the in-between times. I shared her ecstasy when she cleared her MBA entrance exams and went to study in one of the best colleges, promising to be in touch for the brief period she was going to be away studying in a different city. And remain in touch we did. She was in turn my sounding board when I went through the lows in my life and needed someone to just listen to what I said. We were there for each another during happy and sad times. Each time, life took us different ways, literally or figuratively, I felt maybe the relationship might lose the steam and die a natural death but somehow life also ensured we meet at interjections and refuel lost momentum. Our friendship has survived the odd misunderstandings, ensuing fights and long-distances. Touchwood!

So, have we changed as persons in so many years? Yes! we have evolved in some ways. Our personalities have undergone some changes too. Has our equation then changed? Hell no! we are still the same giggly girls in core who connect at a deeper level. It seems incredible that we have journeyed together through our formative years, significant phases of life and then come full-circle where we witness our kids being each others' play dates. Time will only tell if they too become friends to carry forward the legacy.

So, do you have one such friend in your life? 

34 comments:

  1. Nope! surprisingly I really dont have a BFF...infact can I be really honest? I didnt even know what BFF meant until I started reading blogs two years ago.and that too I have to google it :( I am sad eh?

    I have had loads of friends over the years, but no one like a BFF with whom I share a friendship like you share with A..to you and A..and many more years of friendship..hope the 18 turns 180 :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL..these abbreviations and all even I learnt from blogs and google.
      Hmm..good friends are rare to come by, even if they are not your best friend.Honestly, these terms are quite a farce at times too..but if you have one real good friend you can count on, then too its great!
      Thanks, RM!

      Delete
    2. I did not know what is stands for too until now. I just assumed it is Best Friend Friend to emphasize the relationship. Touchwood Uma!! You are really lucky. I am in touch with few friends from school and college days and work place, but I don't share every little thing in my life with them when we do meet/talk. But it's great to have them in my life.

      Delete
    3. Yeah Vibha, these abbreviations are all thanks to the blogworld :-)
      It is nice that you are still in touch with your school and college friends.
      Thanks, Vibha!

      Delete
  2. Hi Uma,
    I loved reading this!! It's always nice to know about such wonderful friendships... :-)

    ReplyDelete
  3. TOUCH WOOD to your friendship!

    Though I don't have any BFFs but I can truly feel the bliss they bring to you through your words!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, Me! yep..good friends are always to be cherished :-)))

      Delete
  4. Really sweet post.. Wishing you and your friend many more years of friendship.. I have had different bffs at different points in my life.. I married my best friend and after that I don't think I've had any bffs.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks, Bhargavi! yeah, different bffs do happen..and you got to marry your bff?? how lovely is that! you don't need any bff anymore :-)

      Delete
  5. I do, I do. I relate to all that you said above. Isn't it so special. There's nothing quite like a BFF. We're lucky :). Really...not everybody finds a friend who seems just right for them.
    I've been thinking of putting up a tribute for my besty too...been putting it off though. This is a beautiful post, Uma. I'm sure A's lucky to have a BFF in you too. She must have been so moved by this acknowledgement, right? :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. you do, right DN?? sure we are lucky! :-)
      do post about your friend too..would love to read..well..my friend doesn't read my blog yet, so...:-)
      Thanks, DN! :-)

      Delete
  6. I used to think BFF meant best female friend! :)
    You are sooo lucky! May you always be this close :) I have one too, actually two but just one that I am in touch with regularly and see every year - unfortunately we have never lived in the same city :( Going strong for 21 years now!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Like RM, I did google too when I came across these short forms around the blogosphere..I tried hard to decipher what the third "F" could mean but couldn't go beyond "best friend" ..lolol
      Yeah, actually we are a group of five but each of us share different dynamics with the other although all of us can technically be called very good friends :-))
      It is sheer coincidence that we came to live in the same city.
      21 years sounds wonderful. You actually make the effort to see each other is something really commendable. Wish you guys many more such years of friendship!
      and, thanks :-)))

      Delete
  7. 18 years is definitely a lifetime & really fortunate you girls had the opportunity to reconnect & fleet in & out of a 100 topics. nothing like it :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. true, Sujatha! I really feel fortunate..:-))

      Delete
  8. So nice to read this Uma, I have a couple from college and also a cousin who I'm quite close to, so I can completely understand how there are things you can discuss only with that friend even though your husband may be your "best friend" for most occasions :).

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. So good to know that you too are in touch with friends from college, Aparna. And, having a cousin as a best friend is great too..that way you need not feel guilty about family gossip being leaked out ;-)

      Delete
  9. Ohhhhh Uma.. You cannot even imagine how happy you made me feel by writing this post! I have a BFF too. It is almost nearing an year since we met. But, the bond we share remains same. Some things just don't get old!
    Awww.. I am so happy!
    Needless to say.. I loved the write-up :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. am glad that I could make you glad, Sahana! The bond is a precious one, am sure. Yay! to more such friendships..
      and thanks, girl!
      I hope you are back to the blogging world for good..missed you around.

      Delete
  10. I do... not one but 2 childhood girlfriends who are my lifelines! they are everything that you have said. we have grown up sharing our school stories, college crushes and marriage related insecurities. Now, we are mothers and almost mothers and we are still the same kids we were. we live in different continents, across different time zones, but we do manage to keep in touch. *Touchwood*

    its a bond that has shown so prominently that parents and now our respective husbands understand our innate need to talk/ meet each other even in times when it is most "not possible". and I think that just enhances our deep rooted friendship. I really do not even remember when we became friends.

    I am gonna soon dedicate an entire post to them. in my blogathon. :) :)

    btw, hw u been? sarry for not being able to comment. will explain the reasons on my blog, which hopefully will be updated soon enough!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. yes, *touchwood* to such friendships :-)
      I am doing fine..how about you? So, when is the blogathon beginning?
      Don't worry about not being able to comment..I understand..
      Looking forward to your blogathon..

      Delete
    2. blogathon will commence once I am in the US... though not immediately after. Please keep bugging me for the blogathon, lest I let lethargy take over me! n yeah thx for understanding! ;)

      Delete
  11. hey where did your latest post disappear?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. err..when did you see it?? I decided against publishing it..
      maybe some other time..:-)

      Delete
    2. i came here for the latest post... and it appears on the "reading list" on the blogger dashboard. it seemed interesting enough to evoke interest. do post it soon :)

      Delete
    3. Yup I read it too on my blogger reading list :)

      Delete
    4. Trust blogger to act prompt when least expected! There are sometimes when the post does not get updated even after a few hours...and then there are such times...:-)
      when you don't write as anonymous and when there are people who you know in real life that read your blog, the topics can get a little restrictive, hence the second thoughts about the post...

      Delete
  12. Always good to have a partner in crime. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. yes, Hiral :-)
      Welcome to my space, Hiral!

      Delete
  13. Well, this is A !!!! The fortunate bff! Just re-read this write up and re-loved every bit of it! Thanks Uma, you made me feel special and helped re-live all those times. Well, here's to yet another round of the gurly chatter!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Heyyyy Apsy...got your sms late last night..wanted to reply today but forgot :-( Yep..cheers to more girly chatter..had an equally lovely time with you :-)

      Delete
  14. Totally Agree Uma. Every single word made sense. I am proud to say that I have someone like that. Lovely post. Cheers !!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks a lot, Cynthia..glad you liked it :-)

      Delete

Would love to hear from you :-)
Also, please click the subscribe by Email link below the comment form to get follow-up comments to your inbox..