Full of mixed feelings is what I'd describe my current mood to be. One of our couple friends is moving to a distant part of the city in a few weeks from now. Although, technically, we will still be in the same city, it will be practically impossible to meet every weekend or just drop in unannounced at each other's place for a quick coffee and chat during the week- something that had become a routine with us over the past couple of years since we moved to Bangalore.
As I look back at how our friendship developed over the years, it brings a happy smile to my face. The guy and the husband used to be roomies during their bachelorhood. When he got married (just 6 months after our wedding), his wife and I became good friends. However they moved to B'lore soon after and we only remained in touch over the phone. We had our babies in the same year (just a month apart) and this made the bonding even stronger. We went through similar pains and troubles in the first year of being parents. We'd trade our horror stories of breast-feeding and general baby stuff and feel re-assured with each other's experience.
Later, when we moved to B'lore, and got a place close to where they lived, our joy knew no bounds. Impromptu get-togethers, potlucks, lunch/dinner at the others house for no reason, and night overs became a part of our life. Since the kids are also of the same age, we had more reason to meet, discuss and share things. They are one of those rare people who you can trust and depend on during difficult times. They have never faltered and failed to lend their help (in any form) whenever the need arose. (I just hope we've also been good friends to them.)
The husband, who is generally frugal in displaying finer emotions, also confessed feeling bad about having them move away from us. As they say, change is the only constant in life. Nothing is more unwise than to slip into a comfort zone and hope that things will continue in the current form forever. Of, course, we are happy for them, 'cause this move means a lot for them in many ways and we wish them all the very best. But, we are surely going to miss them. Weekends will never be the same.
As I look back at how our friendship developed over the years, it brings a happy smile to my face. The guy and the husband used to be roomies during their bachelorhood. When he got married (just 6 months after our wedding), his wife and I became good friends. However they moved to B'lore soon after and we only remained in touch over the phone. We had our babies in the same year (just a month apart) and this made the bonding even stronger. We went through similar pains and troubles in the first year of being parents. We'd trade our horror stories of breast-feeding and general baby stuff and feel re-assured with each other's experience.
Later, when we moved to B'lore, and got a place close to where they lived, our joy knew no bounds. Impromptu get-togethers, potlucks, lunch/dinner at the others house for no reason, and night overs became a part of our life. Since the kids are also of the same age, we had more reason to meet, discuss and share things. They are one of those rare people who you can trust and depend on during difficult times. They have never faltered and failed to lend their help (in any form) whenever the need arose. (I just hope we've also been good friends to them.)
The husband, who is generally frugal in displaying finer emotions, also confessed feeling bad about having them move away from us. As they say, change is the only constant in life. Nothing is more unwise than to slip into a comfort zone and hope that things will continue in the current form forever. Of, course, we are happy for them, 'cause this move means a lot for them in many ways and we wish them all the very best. But, we are surely going to miss them. Weekends will never be the same.
Aww, does sound depressing. But still, maybe not every weekend ... yet, they are in the same city. That's the bright spot :)
ReplyDeleteHuggs.
I know..just trying to find some bright spots now..
Deletewelcome to this space!:-)
Oh that sucks uma...its difficult to get and keep couple friends like that. I feel ur disappointment and sadness. However atleast they are in the same city!! They will be missed but the reunions will be all the more sweeter :)
ReplyDeleteseriously! and, know what, my other friend is also going away for a short term, say a year or two, to another country, so it's minus one more couple friend :-( *sob sob*
DeleteThat's bad Uma, I can understand your concern at how tough it is to meet somebody who stays in a further away part of town :(. But take it as all the more inspiration to make more meets happen, I really hope so :).
ReplyDeleteI know how much commitment and inspiration it takes, given the fact how much we've met ;-) :-))
DeleteHmm that's sad, but they are still in the same city. I know you may need to plan your time together but it will be something to look forward to! Life where change is the only constant!
ReplyDeleteYeah, now the meets will have to be stay overs, so more planning :-)
Deleteawww! I can understand how you feel. even my best friend here has gone to live farther from us. and like u said those impromptu meets for coffee and stay overs have completely stopped. i miss her tremendously and no matter who says so, phone calls are just not enough or justifying. the meets are meets and they are special! hope u two work it out and get to be together in some way or the other!
ReplyDeleteawww...you too? ya, I hope we do keep meeting..
DeleteOhh... touch wood to such a beautiful friendship!
ReplyDeleteAnd I am sure distance will not matter in such wonderful relationships :)
yes, touchwood! hope so, Me!
DeleteFrom my experience I have observed over a period we develop new friends and become close to them especially when one is in transferable job.But such close friendships of the earlier period remain green for long.Time and distance definitely erodes the intimacy over a long period.
ReplyDeleteYes, the quality of friendships matter in the long run..
Deletehow have you been, Kp sir?
Changes are a part of life...
ReplyDeleteSome for good, some for bad,
Some make us happy, some make us sad,
Even though this life is strange,
It needs changes, for a change!!
perfect lines, Radhika! loved it :-)
DeleteOh Uma, describes how I felt when I moved to Chennai from Bombay. But guess what, distance did not diminish my close relationship with my friends at all. And more reason to travel! And Radhika did put it brilliantly, didn't she? :)
ReplyDeleteSo glad to know that the distance did not alter the equation..Yep, I hope this will make us plan better and keep meeting.
Deleteoh having bid bye to lot of such close close friends I really can understand what you are trying to convey... I dont have anything to say most have tried to cheer you up... so all the best may your friendship go long way dear....
ReplyDeletethanks, Ramya for the soothing words and good wishes :-)
DeleteIt is difficult to say goodbye to such close friends.... I wish the friendship still remains despite physical distance.
ReplyDeleteI wish too, Jas! :-)
DeleteHey Hugs Uma..I know how you are feeling...Every time we shifted city, we went through this pain...Hope you will keep getting chance to meet your friends...
ReplyDeleteThe trick will be to create occasions, ZM and hopefully we'll be able to do so.
DeleteAll I can say is u r extremely lucky to have such people in ur life...When the world is indifferent,people on whom u can rely seems a boon...love and trust will probably increase owing to the distance....True friends are a delight and can make life meaningful and beautiful..........
ReplyDeletethanks, Anonymous for the thoughtful comment! I completely agree with you.
DeleteWish you had left your name too...