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Hello everyone! I'm alive, thanks for asking.


It's been a month since I wrote something here. So, should I call this as my comeback post or will this be just a filler? It's difficult to say at this moment as I seem to have lost all interest/motivation/energy/creativity-call what you may-to fill up this space. Sadly, something that I though I was passionate about is withering away without no gardener to nourish its roots. I cannot place my finger on any one single reason other than a combination of the usual reasons- writer's block, busy life and sinking motivation.

There were times when ideas did crop up and I felt the familiar urge, albeit one with a far lesser intensity, to update the blog. The idea and feeling, sadly, passed away too soon in my recently accelerated routine life. Now, there's where there is some activity and excitement and probably why my energies are all diverted. The handover of the new house is to happen very soon and I'm in the midst of heavy duty work of getting all the documents in place, meeting up with my designer's team and following up with the site engineer to buck up with the finishing work.

I'm all excited and anxious about the next phase - of getting the place done up. This is something I've been imagining about for the past many months and now as the time gets nearer, my anxiety level seems to have gone up by a new notches. Suddenly, everything seems overwhelming. I'm besieged by doubts of how things will shape up, what if something goes wrong-which I'm sure does happen in such cases, if the entire plan of design, storage, lighting, etc will all match up to our needs and expectation. 

My content writing work has also picked in past few months and I'm seeing some positive developments. So again, this is something else that has kept me on my toes, which, ironically has lead me to neglect the space that was instrumental in bringing the work to me.

The final and main culprit is of course, a lack of motivation. When I started out, I wrote because I liked to. Then when the reader community grew, this liking developed into a sort of narcissism. I'd be all excited to compose and publish a post and then would eagerly await comments. The fact that people read me and wanted to share their opinion gave me a certain high and I got addicted. Sadly, I noticed, my love for writing has been replaced by need for approval and recognition from fellow writers. I am unable to write freely because my mind is blocked with external factors.

I'm hoping to crawl my way back to when I began. Until then,a short update: 

 My parents were here for the past three weeks and we had an awesome time bonding. Celebrating Avaniavittam and Gokulashtami with them was so much more fun than usual. R got a huge chunk of special time with his grandparents and he enjoyed their attention to bits. The house feels so empty today as we saw them off to the station. R, who usually is brave while saying goodbyes, cried bitterly. Sigh! the pitfalls of living away from family and cousins.



Comments

  1. Yes, I really look forward to your posts! But lots is happening at your end so it's only natural you prioritise! Good luck on all fronts that you are currently battling on! And please put up pics of your new home when done!

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    1. thanks, Vibha! yes, will def put up pics :-)

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  3. It happens with me too.. falling short of ideas, lack of motivation, etc etc... nevertheless we all need a break so that we can bounce back, don't we?? Best of luck for your new home, big task it is!! BTW, will you share the pics or show it to me live?? Actually I'll be visiting Bangalore next month for some official work.. will share the details.. hope to meet you!! :)

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    1. Hey that's cool. Let me know when and lets see if we can meet up. Hope to see you too!

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  4. Oh I can totally relate to not having time to write! My recent post was along the same lines :)
    Don't worry, you will surely bounce back. That's what happened with me. When you love something so much, you cannot stay away from it for too long.
    Good luck with the house! Am sure it will come out really well :) My sis had the same anxiety when she did the interiors for her home but it turned out to be above expectations.

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    1. I'm afraid if I stay out too long, I might lose the zest in totality.
      Ah, your sister's case sounds very comforting. *fingers crossed for mine.*

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  5. Yes, you have been missed here :) Good to hear there are positive developments on the work front. The house stuff is bound to take a lot of energy and mindspace - its ok, your loyal readers will wait for you to spring back :)

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  6. Yipeee..glad to have you back...I am sure you will do an awesome job with the decor...you have a flair for it :) and yay to more content writing..hope things work out perfect for you..

    When do you plan to come to Bombay now?

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  7. My net connection is driving me crazy, thought I had already commented here :(. I am in a somewhat similar space Uma, think of writing something and somehow not getting to it, or forgetting before I actually reach the blog :P. It'll get better for sure Uma, as these are such favourite haunts of ours.. we can't stay away for too long I'm sure :).

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  8. Every writer goes through this phase. I went through this phase just recently and now forced myself to get into the groove. However far we go, we cannot forget the place where we started, right? :)

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  9. Hey it's absolutely normal....u r just going thru wht every blogger experiences, if u didnt then u need to get worried;-D

    I'm guessing u r busy with ur new house decorations....Goodluck:-)).

    And get back soon;-D

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  10. hey, thank you all for all the reassurances and wishes :-)))))

    ReplyDelete

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