The return gift culture

Birthday parties of children these days give me the heebies jeebies. It is like a mini-wedding in the family! You need to plan well in advance if you wish to host a party that is in line with the current trend. And, the dishes served are no less than at a wedding reception. It is mostly dinner, mind you. Whatever happened to those fun-parties that had the staple wafers, cake, one samosa and a glass of Rasna to wash it all down. When parties meant an hour of merry-making at the house of the host, give small presents to the birthday child, eat and come home.

Children anyway do not eat much at these parties, so the grub is all for the mothers who chauffeur the kids. Is it really necessary to keep an elaborate 4 course meal, apart from a kid's menu? And, what stumps me most is the return gift policy. Ok, I understand that kids feel happy to get something in return but when that 'something' looks and costs more than what you took as a birthday gift, it becomes a little too embarrassing and unnecessary. It is almost like one (the parents, that is) is clamouring to out-do the other in these events. I am attending a fair share of birthday parties these days and I wonder a lot at the extravaganza, not to mention the amount of wastage of many precious resources-food being one of them.

For all the boasting I did about how I managed to organize R's party just a few months ago, I felt like someone put cold water on my face when I attended the next few birthday bashes. I had certainly been living under the rock for I had not known that the showbiz that is a feature of Indian weddings had percolated far down to a child's party too. I felt small and muted by all the proceedings. I was painfully reminded of in many ways, how nowadays simplicity is not a virtue (not to mention being reminded of the 'small token' that I had doled out as return gifts :-0)

I, for one, do not believe in having a grand party each year for the child. Of course, the definition of grand is quite different from what I knew. These days, even at-home parties also cost a bomb and if you are going to keep up with the current trend, then there is really no end to spending. It is nice to see kids having fun at their birthdays and you want to give in and indulge since it is their special day. But, how and where do you draw the line is the million dollar question.

I know, these things are personal choices but I cannot help marvel at how much our generation is responsible in making the next generation more materialistic than we are. It is quite evident when kids attend a party with their eyes and excitement planted on (and sometimes only on) the return gift. The essence and fun factor is all skewed. But, isn't this all our doing? Kids are going to be kids. It is up to us to direct them correctly towards more meaningful things.

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Classically yours

Bollywood has given us some of the best songs that are either purely or partly based on a classical raaga. Composing songs based on classical raagas was the forte of yesteryear composers like Naushad, S.D.Burman, Madan Mohan, Vasant Desai to name a few. Even R.D. Burman who first introduced us to western beats gave us splendid songs that were purely based on raagas. The era of classical melodies in Bollywood ended with the beginning of the late 70s action-oriented movies and later the advent of techno-pop and dhinchak beats. Nowadays, in most songs, it is the rhythm that lingers longer than the melody, if at all. Total Recall on Times Now this Sunday brought back the memories associated with those classical gems that were my best companion not very long ago.

Being born in a musical family and also a student of classical music, I was used to the game of "identifying/guess the ragam" of a song in my childhood. Mother would have a proud smile on her face when I'd hit the bulls-eye even with some difficult-to-guess ones. Later, when my interest in music bended towards light music/film music, I'd try to find similarities between the Carnatic and Hindustani ragas. Come any competition and my choice for song always tended to the ones that had a classical touch to it.

SA RE GA MA (of the times when Sonu Nigam used to host it) was the first music show that promoted real talent. I'd remain glued to the T.V set for the slotted hour, nodding away in awe at the extraordinary singing talent displayed by most of the contestants. The rounds were truly competitive at that time. Be it the classical song round, where the participants had to choose a song that truly tested their caliber in the song rendition while adhering to the sur and taal along with the finesse with which they handled the harkats (movements or variations). If they could bring in a touch of their originality, they got extra brownie points. The Taal round on the other hand was truly a mind boggling one that put even the top-notch contestants in a spot. The original taal would be changed (either in the tempo or the number of beats itself ) and the participant would be required to sing to the changed taal without making the song sound out of rhythm! Clearly, a test of how well a person understood the maatras and percussion. Every round would be a learning material for aspiring singers and the audience too.

And, when like-minded people got together during weddings or other occasions, we would spend many an hour debating on who was a better singer in a particular episode, the debate reaching ridiculous degree of intensity with each side passionately advocating their choice of contestant. I can still recall the names of many of the participants whose exemplary singing remained in my heart long after. Such was the high-standard. The judges were revered names from the classical and film industry and there were no staged squabbles among them to increase the TRPs.

The mushrooming song and dance reality shows that have come to replace shows like SA RE GA MA are an extremely watered down version with more emphasis on the TRPs rather than the actual talent hunt. The talent today is no less, on the contrary, is in on a all-time high. However, I feel, the bar to test them has been lowered many times over. Also, with new age technology, any blemish in the pitching or in the rendering of the song can be corrected. You don't really need to be a classically trained as every thing is digitized and an off-the mark note can be tweaked to attain the perfect output. On a recent interview of Shreya Ghoshal in a newspaper, she had remarked that during the times when she was a contestant on SA RE GA MA, they (the contestants) were free to choose a difficult song that none had heard of, for rendition, but now the songs have to be ones that are popular with the masses to gain viewership.

It is a pity that music of such kind is no longer a preferred option. Is it too technical for this generation to appreciate? Will melody slowly fade away into oblivion? Will classical music be left to be explored only on a pure platform through concerts? Can the present and next league of composers not recreate the confluence of popular and classical music like their predecessors? These are some questions that may perhaps be unanswered.

I'll leave you with some of my favourite songs that were played on this Total Recall episode:

Laaga Chunri mein daag based on Bhairavi in Hindustani or Sindhu Bhairavi in Carnatic music

Naino mein badra based on Ragam Aberi of Carnatic or Bhimpalasi in Hindustani

Raina beeti jaaye based on Todi of Hindustani or Shuba panthuvarali of Carnatic

Beeti na bitayi raina based on Yaman kalyani of Hindustani or Kalyani of Carnatic

The list can go on and on but since the post is already long enough, I'll put a stop here. Are you also a fan of classical based songs? Do share your views/favourite songs?

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